Aging: The Gain Is Yours to Find!
Hello friends! 🌻
Happy August—the “Sunday of Summer.” 😎 It’s that moment when we’re reminded to slow down and savor what’s left of the season, even as we feel the gentle slope toward fall with school starting and routines shifting. For some, it even brings a version of the “Sunday scaries”—that mix of nostalgia and anticipation as one chapter winds down and another begins.
Speaking of slopes and transitions…
We’re often taught to see aging as a downhill slide: energy fading, beauty shifting, opportunities shrinking. I don’t love that picture. Yes, some changes are real (my knees certainly don’t love the ski slopes the way they used to!), but that’s only one side of the story—and it’s not the whole truth.
It’s completely normal to have moments of negative thinking about aging. Research even shows many people hit a dip in satisfaction during their 40s and 50s before happiness rises again in their 60s.
But what if we flipped that script? What if, instead of bracing for loss, we started noticing—and even focusing on—what actually improves with age?
This doesn’t mean ignoring the challenges. Our bodies change. Our lives shift. Sometimes the things we counted on look different than we imagined.
But alongside those changes often come unexpected gifts: deeper relationships, a clearer sense of who we are, and the freedom to live life on our own terms.
I have to admit, I’m still learning to notice some of the unconscious stigmas about aging that I’ve absorbed growing up. It’s humbling to realize how those old beliefs can quietly sneak in and shape the way I see myself, and others.
Owning that bias has made me more intentional about the mindset I choose now—and research shows that adopting empowering beliefs about aging can have a profound impact on our health, happiness, and even cognitive ability.
Lately, I’ve been asking myself:
What in life actually gets better with age—not because it’s easier, but because we are wiser, more present, and less bound by “shoulds”?
As I sit with that question, I’ve come to learn that a balanced mindset about aging isn’t about ignoring the hard parts or forcing ourselves to see everything through rose-colored glasses. It’s really about making space for both truths—the reality of change and the possibility of growth. When we make a few intentional shifts in how we view this season of life, aging can become less about what we’re losing and more about the richness we’re gaining.
🌿 10 Ways to Practice a Balanced Mindset About Aging
Here are 10 ways to practice a more balanced, empowering mindset about aging—simple shifts that build over time.
- Notice What’s Growing 🌱
Shift focus from what you’re losing to what’s deepening: wisdom, clarity, relationships, self-acceptance.
- Stay Curious About Yourself 🤔
Midlife and beyond can be a time of rediscovery. Ask: What brings me alive right now? What do I want to explore next?
- Choose Empowering Language 🗣️
How you talk about aging shapes how you experience it. Swap “I’m getting old” for “I’m still becoming.”
- Curate Your Inputs ✨
Surround yourself with stories of people thriving in later life to counter cultural messages of decline.
- Name and Challenge Internalized Ageism 👵🏻
When you hear yourself thinking, I’m too old for this, pause and ask: Is that true, or is it a script I’ve absorbed?
- Stay in Beginner Energy ⚡
Learn something new—big or small. Starting fresh keeps the mind flexible and reminds you that growth never stops.
- Connect Across Generations 👥
Spending time with people both younger and older than you widens your perspective and breaks down stereotypes.
- Practice Self-Compassion with Change ☺️
Meet physical and life shifts with kindness instead of criticism. Grace with yourself builds resilience.
- Anchor in Meaning Over Milestones 🪷
Shift your focus from external markers (career, appearance, achievements) to what truly matters: purpose, presence, and connection.
- Celebrate Accumulated Wisdom 🎉
Regularly pause to notice the experience and insights you’ve gained—it’s one of the most valuable “returns” on time.
Part of building a balanced mindset about aging is reconnecting to what you truly want—not what you were told to want, not what you used to want, but what matters to you now. The practices above create space for that kind of reflection.
As our lives shift through different seasons, our desires shift too. Balanced aging means noticing those changes without judgment and letting them shape the vision for your next chapter.
That’s exactly what we’ll be exploring together in this month’s Office Hours—how to peel back the “shoulds,” reconnect to what really matters now, and create a vision for this next chapter that feels rich, balanced, and fully your own.
Join Me in August Office Hours: What Do You Want? 🤔
Together, we’ll:
- Unpack internalized expectations and “shoulds”
- Reconnect to your personal values and true desires
- Dream without judgment and rebuild a vision for your next chapter
📅 When: Tuesday, August 5, 2025 | 9:00 am – 10:00 am (PST)
📍 Where: Zoom – Here’s the link!
If the idea of life getting better with age resonates with you, this is the perfect next step. Or if you’re just curious - join us!
THIS & THAT
Follow-up from July Newsletter
Last month we talked about joy, and I enjoyed the responses! Two of you reminded me how beautifully joy can show up in everyday rituals, especially around food.
My good friend and fellow subscriber, Julie, caught something I completely forgot to include in the last newsletter: The Joy of Cooking by Irma S. Rombauer and Marion Rombauer Becker. How could I miss that classic? For nearly a century, it’s been a trusted kitchen companion, bringing joy to countless tables.
Another subscriber, Jackie—an avid volunteer and true domestic queen—shared her own summer joy: making the most of her garden harvest. She painted such a wonderful picture of garden-to-table meals and food preservation. Jackie was even kind enough to send one of her favorite recipes, perfect for any time of year but especially delicious when fresh salad ingredients are at their peak.
Thank you, Julie and Jackie, for spreading the joy and reminding us that simple, everyday pleasures can be deeply meaningful.
Bob's Blue Cheese Dressing
Prep time: 20 min Total time: 20 min
Ingredients
1 cup crumbled blue cheese
1 cup mayonnaise
1 cup sour cream
2 teaspoons lemon juice
1 teaspoon hot pepper sauce
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley
1 tablespoon honey
1 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 teaspoon salt
Directions: In large bowl, whisk together the blue cheese, mayonnaise, sour cream, lemon juice, hot pepper sauce, Worcestershire sauce, parsley, honey, pepper and salt. Chill until serving.
(I don't care for heat so I only use a couple drops of the hot pepper sauce. I like lots of blue cheese so I often add extra. This keeps well in the refrigerator.)
SAVE THE DATE! WORKSHOP ANNOUNCEMENT
Back by Popular Demand ...
Building Your Legacy In Midlife and Beyond
📅 Date: Friday, September 12, 2025
⏰ Time: 9:00 am – Noon
Your legacy isn’t just what you leave—it’s what you live every day.
This engaging, hands-on workshop will help you clarify your evolving sense of purpose and fulfillment in midlife and beyond. Through guided reflection, meaningful conversations, and intentional exercises, you’ll create a personalized blueprint for:
- Living with intention
- Reclaiming your identity
- Defining the values and gifts you want to carry forward
This year’s workshop has been thoughtfully revamped from last year’s event. It includes familiar content paired with an improved guided process for reflection, honoring your story, and sharing collective wisdom.
✨ If you attended last year and feel a refresher would help, you are warmly invited to join again! Previous attendees will receive a special discount.
Registration information will be out soon! Be on the watch for it.
FINAL THOUGHTS
As we savor the last stretch of summer, I keep coming back to the idea of balance—especially when it comes to aging. A balanced mindset means making space for both honoring where we’ve been and staying open to what’s next. It’s letting go of old “shoulds” while inviting in new dreams.
August is a beautiful time to pause, take stock, and ask yourself: What do I really want for this next chapter? That’s exactly what we’ll explore together in this month’s Office Hours, and I’d love for you to join us.
And looking ahead, I’m so excited to bring back the Building Your Legacy in Midlife and Beyond workshop in September. Whether you’re crafting your next adventure or seeking deeper meaning in your everyday life, this workshop is a chance to create a blueprint for living your legacy now—not someday.
🌞 Until then, make the most of these lingering summer days. Collect small joys, breathe in the warmth, and remember that every season has something to teach us.
Savoring summer with you,
Judy
PS: If you know someone navigating midlife and beyond who would enjoy these reflections, feel free to forward this newsletter their way. They can join the email list to get future issues (and join us for upcoming Office Hours!).
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